Introducing a New Sibling: Preparing Your Toddler for the Adjustment

No matter how many babies you bring home, giving your little one’s a new sibling is such an exciting time, for everyone in the family! It can also feel a little overwhelming when it comes to navigating the transition.

 

If you are here because you’re expecting another baby, congratulations! Know that you don’t have to navigate the newborn stage alone (no matter how many littles you bring home)!

 

If you haven’t already, download my FREE newborn sleep guide. It’ll give you a good rundown on establishing good sleep for your newborn that you can print and keep with you! Download for free here 💤

 

In this blog post, I’m going to talk about…

 

5 Tips for Introducing Your Toddler to Their New Sibling

 

What about jealousy and sibling rivalry?

 

How is this going to affect my toddler’s sleep?

 

How do I navigate my toddler sharing a room with their new sibling?

 

Let’s get into it!

 

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

 

 

5 Tips for Introducing Your Toddler to Their New Sibling

 

Naturally, we would like this adjustment to go as smoothly as possible. Here are a few tips that can help!

 

1. Plan ahead

 

Talk about this big change with your toddler ahead of time. This includes talking with them about how to safely hold their new sibling. You can model and practice this with them using a doll!

 

2. Give your toddler a special job

 

Whether it’s keeping your water cup filled or putting the pacifier back in when it falls out, this is something that can help them feel valued and responsible. You know your kiddo(s) best, so pick a job you think they’ll like and feel confident and helpful doing.

 

3. Make “sibling gifts”

 

Have your toddler make/choose a special gift for their new sibling (think toy for tummy time, swaddle blanket, a drawing, etc.) and have the new baby “choose” a special gift for your toddler.

 

4. Know that some jealousy is normal!

 

Make it a point to remind your toddler that you love them SO much and that their new baby sibling loves them so much too! 

 

5. Have realistic expectations

 

There are a lot of big feelings when a new baby enters the family. It’s okay if it’s not the fairy tale meeting you were hoping for! The most important thing is that you are there to support your toddler and help them work through their feelings. 

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

Click here to watch more on introducing your toddler to their new sibling on Instagram.

 

 

What about jealousy and sibling rivalry?

 

Sibling rivalry obviously isn’t a huge issue when we first bring home the new baby (at least, from your newborn’s perspective!). However, it can definitely be top of mind when anticipating your new arrival and the dynamic of having more than one little one.

 

Please know that sibling rivalry is totally normal and even a healthy part of sibling relationships. However, it can feel EXHAUSTING being the referee…and is that really our job?

 

Like most things in parenting, the best way to handle it is to find a balance between teaching, modeling, and guiding, and also giving space for them to work on figuring it out independently. 

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

Click here to watch a video of my two youngest daughters’ experience and navigate some sibling rivalry on Instagram.

 

 

How is this going to affect my toddler’s sleep?

 

First of all, know that navigating sleep while going through new adjustments (like bringing home a new baby) is going to be 1000 times easier if your toddler has got sleep down pat. If you want to solidify your toddler’s sleep skills, grab a consultation so we can learn about your specific toddler’s needs and troubleshoot with you. If you are looking for a more DIY approach, in my 2-5 years content library, you’ll learn through a series of guides how to navigate those big toddler emotions while still preserving sleep. 

 

One of the best things you can do for your toddler’s sleep (even before their new sibling arrives) is have a solid bedtime routine. Make sure to give your toddler lots of choices (which pjs they want to wear, whether to go potty or brush their teeth first, etc.) and include some snuggles. This sets the stage by helping them wind down at night and demonstrates to them what getting ready for bedtime really means and looks like.

 

If you haven’t already, check out my Toddler Bedtime Visual Schedule. It’s printable and 100% customizable for YOUR bedtime routine. Get it here!

 

A sleep regression is totally possible for your toddler once a new baby steps into the picture. The most important thing is to stay calm and try not to get too overwhelmed. The good news is that most sleep regressions resolve on their own within 2 weeks. 

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

 

Here are a few other things to remember when it comes to optimizing your toddler’s sleep, regardless of whether or not you are bringing home a new sibling:

 

If your toddler starts escaping the crib…

 

Escaping the crib in the middle of the night is just another side effect of toddler FOMO. No one is more thrilled than a toddler with the whole house all to themselves. All joking aside, navigating the boundaries around this can be tricky! The key is to 

  1. Set clear, firm, and loving boundaries
  2. Meet their need(s)
  3. Incentivize (we want them to “buy in” so everyone is happy)

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

Click here to watch more about toddlers climbing out of the crib.

 

At some point, you’ll need to move them to a big kid bed

 

When it comes time to move from the crib to a big kid bed, we want to delay the transition as long as we can. Because toddlers are developing their big personalities, moving them to a big kid bed too soon might make the power struggles a lot more intense. I have an entire blog post about making the transition to a big kid bed – check it out here! 

 

Toddlers still need naptime

 

When toddler FOMO is at an all-time high, we might think our little one is ready to drop naps completely. Don’t fall for it! Your toddler skill needs naps until they are about 3 years old. 

 

If your toddler is refusing naps, keep giving them the time and space for that rest. I like to transition naps into “quiet time”. This means still offering the nap as quiet time in their dark sleep space for them to reset. Even if they never really get to sleep it gives their body the chance to calm down and recharge before making it to bedtime.

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

Click here to watch more about toddler naps on Instagram.

 

If you haven’t already, download my FREE Ultimate Naps Guide. It’ll give you all the knowledge you need to help your baby (or toddler) take great naps! Download for free here 💤

 

How do I navigate my toddler sharing a room with their new sibling?

 

For many families, once the new addition is ready to sleep in their own crib, this might mean moving baby into a room with their older sibling. Before making this transition, I recommend checking for any possible way for your baby to have their own sleep space. A well-ventilated space, even an extra bathroom or cleared-out walk-in closet can work!

 

I talk about what to do when both siblings nap at the same time, siblings sharing a room with a bigger age gap, and more in this blog!

 

New Sibling | The Peaceful Sleeper

 

 

Recap on Introducing a New Sibling

 

Naturally, there are going to be a lot of big feelings when a new baby enters the family…and it’s okay if it’s not the fairy tale meeting you were hoping for! The most important thing is that you are there to support your toddler and help them work through their feelings…and take care of YOU in the process!

 

You don’t have to navigate the new sibling adjustment alone…hop on a call with one of my incredible certified sleep consultants! They can help troubleshoot solutions to your baby’s sleep needs or just be there for any rapid-fire questions you may have.

 

No matter if you’re bringing home your 1st baby or your 4th, I can help you optimize sleep for your newborn (0-4 months), little one (4-24 months), and toddler (2-5 years). Better sleep is possible for EVERYONE in your family!

Christine Lawler

Christine Lawler

MS, LMFT, Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant

Hi! I’m so glad you’re here! I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, practicing for over 13 years. I’ve set out to do ALL of the research and I created a method to optimize baby sleep that is tuned in, empowering and WORKS. There absolutely should be joy in motherhood, and I have learned that every baby CAN get better sleep!

Read more about my team here.

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